Submitted the following video treatment to Purple Ribbon upon Big Boi's special request. Never shot. Would love to shoot this...if the perfect crazy party-dance song came along. Let me know what you think...
Property of Blak Milk Productions
We see DICK MICK, a black newscaster dressed in a badly tailored baby blue suit and a horrible toupee. His lips are ashy, and he talks with a lisp. When he turns to the camera, we see that his eyes are wide with fear— he looks like a man who has just seen an elderly woman harassed in broad daylight.
As we hear the opening chorus, he says, “As you know, this is DICK MICK of BTV NEWS…What you are about to see is shocking…lewd, crude…and partially nude. Please brace yourselves: Perhaps you have even heard about our next story…a group of hooligans calling themselves the Purple Ribbon Posse…Like nefarious criminals from the Wild West they have colorful nicknames! They call themselves Donkey Boy, Lil’ Co and Killer Mike…Over the last two months, they have gone on an outrageous rampage through the South… where with colorful phony guns they have been making outlandish appearances in banks…and using security cameras to make horrible music videos…see for yourself.”
As the first verse begins, we see Lil’ Co in a bank, waving a monstrous blurred out squirt gun. People are running and screaming, diving over counters. He stands in the center of the room, rapping, acting crazy and making the scared fat security guard do the body rock. Killer Mike and Donkey Boy are behind him, pushing their blurred out squirt guns in crying customers’ faces and forcing them “to do the body rock.” Two beautiful female customers begin to enjoy doing the body rock. Making suggestive glances at the security cameras, they throw off their corporate attire and begin gyrating and doing the body rock like professional strippers. Their torsos are blurred out, even though their bright bras are still visible. A blind man goes by doing the robot. A bank teller pours Moet on an elderly dancing woman, whose wig falls off. The peaceful bank has become a riotous party. A ticker tape scrolling across the bottom of the screen reads “Coming NEXT: the BTV world-wide premiere of BODY ROCK!” The shots alternate between black and white security camera footage and gritty color handheld shots.
We see Dick Mick again, sweating and visibly disturbed. He is seated with Big Boi, who is dressed in bowtie, with a briefcase. Dick Mick says, “I’m here with Lucious Leftfoot, a mild mannered businessman, an innocent bystander now traumatized by one of these banking incidents. Do you care to tell us what happened?” Big Boi’s eyes are glazed over, as he fights for words: “The-They made us do the Body Rock.” We see security slow-motion footage of Big Boi being forced to do the Body Rock (Big Boi is circled with yellow). Dick Mick swallows, looks book at the camera, and says: “And now these criminals, the Purple Ribbon Posse, have had the gumption to actually make a professional music video…see for yourself…”
As Killer Mike’s verse begins, we go to a bright video set, complete with sexy, prissy models, dangling microphones, gaffers and impressive cameras. The professional shots alternate with security camera footage. Models gyrate. People hold up drinks and blurred out squirt guns. Right after Killer says “Gucci Man!”, the sound lowers and we hear the instrumental. We see Dick Mick standing in an aisle at a convenience store. In a grave voice, he says, “Here we are in Pay-For-It. As you can see, the hysteria has grown. There are Donkey Boy action figures. A Body Rock exercise tape. And Killer Mike Halloween costumes. See for yourself…” We pan over to a group of children who are in a rampage— dressed in Killer Mike Halloween costumes. We see security camera footage of the kids yanking things off shelves, doing the body rock and laughing with monstrous blurred out squirt guns. We cut back to the end of Killer Mike’s verse.
When the second chorus begins, we see Dick Mick again, standing on the steps of a church. He grimaces, then we follow his glance over to the church sign, which reads: “Come Do the Holy Rock!” We see Cee-lo in a jheri curl. He is eating chicken. His name flashes on the screen: Rev. Spicy Man. Dick Mick says, “Rev. Spicy tell us about the Holy Rock.” Rev. Spicy Man pulls a chicken bone out his mouth and says quietly, “Will my wife see this?" Dick Mick nods no.
Rev. Spicy says, "Okay.” Then says loudly in a preacherly tone: “It started a few weeks back, when I had a religious experience doing the body rock in a club of ill repute. And I decided that my congregation needed to experience what I experienced that night. Since then, the Lord’s mercy has been good to us. The whole choir and congregation is doing the Holy Rock, and our offerings have gone up expeditiously.” We see the whole choir doing the Holy Rock.
We cut back to the interview, where Dick Mick is frowning. Disgusted, he shakes his head and stands, saying “I can’t believe this..” Meanwhile, Rev. Spicy Man does the Holy Rock in the chair, and then passes him a collection plate and says “No one leaves my church…without doing the Holy Rock!” Dick Mick laughs, “What you want some money?” Rev. Spicy Man nods. Dick Mick sighs, takes out his wallet, and begins to take out a couple of dollars. But Rev. Spicy Man reaches over with a laugh and takes his whole wallet.
As the third verse begins, we CUT TO the professional music video, where Donkey Boy is holding up his action figures and doing the Body Rock with Lucious Leftfoot and the wigless elderly woman. The blind man goes by doing the robot. We see security footage as well. As the verse ends, we CUT TO a busy downtown area where Dick Mick is standing on a street corner. Dick Mick says, “Here we are outside of Old National, Georgia’s largest and most historic bank…As you have heard, the culprits will be here any minute…for their first openly televised performance of body rock The police are here, ready to arrest these criminals when they arrive. You can see their fans are here too, the press, what a crazy scene… Oh this might be them…”
An old white utility van pulls up. The door slides open, and a dozen kids spill out dressed like Killer Mike with blurred out squirt guns. They begin doing the body rock, so do the fans and innocent bystanders …a purple smoke grenade explodes in the street…a party starts in the street…Then the Purple Ribbon Posse appears and all hell breaks loose with even the press doing the body rock…Instead of arresting the posse, the police begin taking off their clothes and doing the body rock…Dick Mick screams, “All hell is breaking loose! Mass pandemonium! Cut! Cut!” As the screen fades to black, Dick Mick begins energetically doing the body rock.